by Natalia Chajkovskaya

The question about whether you and your Russian bride are going to communicate well raises concerns of many Western men. It is a valid concern, because poor communication is one of the top five reasons for divorce in the United States, so if you want your marriage to work out, make sure you help your Russian bride with her English skills.

The good news is that most Russian women reach a pretty decent level of English language after the first year of living in the United States. It doesn’t apply to women whose English was fluent before she arrived, because even though she might have some difficulties with Americanized English, it will be much easier for her to adapt to it and be comfortable with it. Ladies, whose English is basic to mediocre usually learn it pretty fast, because as many linguists will confirm, the best way to learn the language of a certain country is to learn it in the country’s environment.
I have to warn you that I know ladies, who have been in the United States for more than three years and still can’t communicate in English well. They learned some words and phrases, but they can’t call and schedule an appointment for themselves, or they never pick up the phone at home, because they can’t understand a thing. I hope these ladies or their husbands will never read this article, but to you I can say that the only reason why these women didn’t learn English is simply because they didn’t learn. During their first year of marriage they surrounded themselves with Russian friends, stocked up on Russian DVD’s and books and spent the rest of their leisure time browsing Russian websites. The only contact with the English language they had were brief communications with their husbands during dinner (after dinner the husbands preferred watching football to trying to communicate with their wives, who couldn’t communicate well anyway).
One guy, seeing that things didn’t go well, even hired his Russian bride a tutor (a good one I must add), but 3 hours a week still were not enough, because in the meantime the woman kept watching, listening and speaking in Russian.
You can’t blame your Russian bride that her English doesn’t improve without blaming yourself as well. It is good for her to have some contact with the Russian community, with her culture and language, but you need to encourage her to learn English and help her out as well.
Even though it might be hard at first, communicate with her as much as you can. Don’t get frustrated if she doesn’t understand something you say or that she can’t express yourself. Have a dictionary handy to help you out if you get stuck. Send her short emails/love notes from work (in English, of course) and ask her to reply. It will not only help her learn English, but help both of you bring some more romance into your relationship.
Encourage her to watch programs in English. If her English is basic, watching news or scientific programs may not do her much good, but watching reality shows and soaps will help her learn English in an easy and effective way.
Take your Russian bride out more often to meet with your family or friends, so that she gets exposed to the language more. She might not feel comfortable at first, because she will not understand much of the conversation and might have to smile silly half of the time. Be supportive and sensitive during such moments and don’t ignore her, because if you are not going to be there for her, such meetings will become like a nightmare.
When you go out to the store or to a restaurant, encourage her to go through checkout by herself or to order her meal. Of course, it is much faster and easier if you do everything for her, but this way she will never learn and you will end up answering calls and making OB/GYN appointments for her for years to come. You don’t want that, do you?
No matter what they say, English is one of the easiest languages to learn. There are no cases like in Russian or Polish and there are no hieroglyphs like in Chinese. If your Russian bride is willing to learn the language and you are willing to help her, her English will improve every month and you will see that all of the work was worth theby Natalia Chajkovskaya effort.

The question about whether you and your Russian bride are going to communicate well raises concerns of many Western men. It is a valid concern, because poor communication is one of the top five reasons for divorce in the United States, so if you want your marriage to work out, make sure you help your Russian bride with her English skills.

The good news is that most Russian women reach a pretty decent level of English language after the first year of living in the United States. It doesn’t apply to women whose English was fluent before she arrived, because even though she might have some difficulties with Americanized English, it will be much easier for her to adapt to it and be comfortable with it. Ladies, whose English is basic to mediocre usually learn it pretty fast, because as many linguists will confirm, the best way to learn the language of a certain country is to learn it in the country’s environment.

I have to warn you that I know ladies, who have been in the United States for more than three years and still can’t communicate in English well. They learned some words and phrases, but they can’t call and schedule an appointment for themselves, or they never pick up the phone at home, because they can’t understand a thing. I hope these ladies or their husbands will never read this article, but to you I can say that the only reason why these women didn’t learn English is simply because they didn’t learn. During their first year of marriage they surrounded themselves with Russian friends, stocked up on Russian DVD’s and books and spent the rest of their leisure time browsing Russian websites. The only contact with the English language they had were brief communications with their husbands during dinner (after dinner the husbands preferred watching football to trying to communicate with their wives, who couldn’t communicate well anyway).

One guy, seeing that things didn’t go well, even hired his Russian bride a tutor (a good one I must add), but 3 hours a week still were not enough, because in the meantime the woman kept watching, listening and speaking in Russian.

You can’t blame your Russian bride that her English doesn’t improve without blaming yourself as well. It is good for her to have some contact with the Russian community, with her culture and language, but you need to encourage her to learn English and help her out as well.

Even though it might be hard at first, communicate with her as much as you can. Don’t get frustrated if she doesn’t understand something you say or that she can’t express yourself. Have a dictionary handy to help you out if you get stuck. Send her short emails/love notes from work (in English, of course) and ask her to reply. It will not only help her learn English, but help both of you bring some more romance into your relationship.

Encourage her to watch programs in English. If her English is basic, watching news or scientific programs may not do her much good, but watching reality shows and soaps will help her learn English in an easy and effective way.

Take your Russian bride out more often to meet with your family or friends, so that she gets exposed to the language more. She might not feel comfortable at first, because she will not understand much of the conversation and might have to smile silly half of the time. Be supportive and sensitive during such moments and don’t ignore her, because if you are not going to be there for her, such meetings will become like a nightmare.

When you go out to the store or to a restaurant, encourage her to go through checkout by herself or to order her meal. Of course, it is much faster and easier if you do everything for her, but this way she will never learn and you will end up answering calls and making OB/GYN appointments for her for years to come. You don’t want that, do you?

No matter what they say, English is one of the easiest languages to learn. There are no cases like in Russian or Polish and there are no hieroglyphs like in Chinese. If your Russian bride is willing to learn the language and you are willing to help her, her English will improve every month and you will see that all of the work was worth the effort.