Western men are often wondering whether young Russian women who post their profiles online are ready for serious relationships.
This is a valid concern, because in the United States and in most countries of Western Europe it is not common for a woman to get married before she graduates college or hits her mid-twenties. Most Western women in their early twenties don’t even think about starting a family and according to recent reports the average marriage age for U.S. women has increased from 22 in 1980 to 25.6 in 2009.
If you look at Russian dating websites you will find a number of young (under 25) Russian women willing to marry and start a family right away. But the fact that they express the desire to get married isn’t a guarantee that they are mature enough to start a family, so the following questions often pop up in Western men’s heads:
Is it common for Russian women to get married young?
Do they often marry older men or do they do it just to get out of the country?
Isn’t it better to find a woman in the same age category?
Do marriages with more than 10 years age difference work out?
How young is too young?
If you are familiar with Russian culture at least a little you probably already know that Russian women have a different view of life and happiness. Not every Russian woman dreams of a brilliant career, but most of them dream of having a good husband and children. Most Russian women go to college and have university degrees, but it is not uncommon for them to start a family before they are done with their degrees.
Being a good mother is crucial for the majority of Russian women and many of them are willing to sacrifice their free time and freedom for their families. It is uncommon for a Russian woman to wait until she is in her late thirties to get pregnant. Since women realize that the younger they are the higher the possibility to get pregnant and the better chances for a healthy child, they usually don’t like to put it off. While it is not unusual to see a 20-year old mother in Russia, seeing a 40-year old pregnant woman is a rare occurrence.
Besides health reasons, Russian women (and Russian people in general) usually mature sooner. Whether it is Russian history, culture, mentality, lifestyle, or all together, many Western guys report that when it comes to Russian women, av10 year difference seems insignificant. Some say that if they didn’t know how old the woman they were dating really was, they would have never guessed their real age by the way the woman behaved and reasoned.
When up to 15 years age difference in Russian-American marriages is normal, relationship experts warn that if you get into a serious relationship with someone 20 or more years younger, you may encounter problems later on. There are exceptions to every rule, of course, and happy couples with an age difference of 20 or even 30 years do exist, but unless you are one hundred percent confident of what you are doing and have a strong connection with the woman, it is better to stick to a more optimal (up to 15) age difference.
Skeptics say that the only reason young Russian women are targeting older Western men is because all they really care about is getting out of the country. They point out that Russian women rarely get married to older Russian men and that statistically the age difference in Russian families is 1-2 years old. While these facts are true, they are easily explained.
In Russia it is culturally acceptable to live with your parents after you start your own family, so Russian men and women don’t usually obsess about making a career or buying a house before getting married. Russian people are generally less materialistic and unlike many Westerns they don’t think that they have to have a huge house, a car and a great career in order to be happy.
Another reason why young Russian women prefer older Western men is the sense of stability, which a 20 year old college student (who will not be looking for a wife online in the first place) can’t provide. Russian women in their early twenties are ripe and ready to start a family, but Western guys of the same age are not. It is natural that young women are looking for men who are mature enough to be good husbands and fathers. If things go well, a woman will have to leave her family and friends and move to an unknown country, where she won’t have anyone but her foreign man to rely on.
To sum it all up, don’t be afraid to start a relationship with a woman just because you think she is too young for you. Keep in mind that Russian culture is different and the fact that she is only 21 or 23 doesn’t mean that she is immature and not ready to get married. Get to know her better before you make any judgments.
